Maybe closure means trying again

12:29 AM

I'm gonna tell you a story, and no this isn't mine to share. Perhaps you've already seen this movie, it's an indie film, it's so dull it's beautiful and it's so real it hurts. I'm not going to tell you the title since I wouldn't want to spoil the movie, so let's focus on the story itself. 

It's about a couple, almost perfect I'd call it —then distance squishes it's way between them. It was the usual commonplace love story, well at least that's how we think it is during the first part. 

Another wasted relationship because they're not from the same place, Im so stressed out.

Then they do everything they can to be with each other, they even got married, because somehow all the moments they shared when they were together made up for the time spent apart. 

Fast forward to the third parties and uncertainties, after a while they got married for passport/visa reasons. It didn't work out the way they wanted it to be and it was denied. More problems surface until they decided to call it off. 

We think it's wrong to snoop on someone else's phone but then if they do and we have nothing to hide, we don't actually get mad. But if they spy something we don't want them to see, we get furious. So who's at fault? 

They went back to the people they dated when they were both apart. It didn't work out, even after three years. They decided it was time to get back together again, so the girl visits the guy. They took a shower together, made life decisions there as they hugged. A thousand memories come rushing back. Then the girl leaves. You can see in the film that their relationship will not workout. In the near end you'd think they're really for each other and then the end of the movie speaks otherwise. 

You see, if they didn't try again, they'd be enveloped in what-ifs. If they didn't try again, in the back of their heads they'd think all the endless possibilities of the relationship work out. 

You can't blame timing, you just can't conclude it as the right love during the wrong time. No. Each time you will encounter problems and responsibilities you don't even want to face, these are called challenges and you're supposed to overcome it, not quit. 

I have lived to confirm that sometimes, closure means trying again. 

I myself have done this a lot of times with different guys with the mere hope that it might work out, but then it doesn't and somehow this is the closure I needed. It is an assurance that even trying again won't fix my situation. I wouldn't have to wrap myself with "what ifs" because I have already confirmed it by being in the relationship again and experiencing how it will never work out. Ask yourself how many "wrong timings" do you need to confirm whether the relationship will or will not work out? How many tries? Regardless, during the process, you will figure it out. 

Closure is confirmation and perhaps trying again might be the only antidote, unless you're strong enough to accept that you're not for each other the first time it didn't work out. 

Dress: Terranova
Photo by: Danielle Gaston

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